The Braves hit a speed hump. 6 of them actually...

(above)After suggesting we throw the game, Crouch had to feign dissapointment at the result on Sunday ...

The Braves kinda shat themselves on the weekend at Bega. Kind of like when you have your first bout of diarohhea and think it's only a fart(hasn't that happened to everyone?). we had kinda hoped to sneak and win, have Merimbula win and sneak into second. Good thing the Braves took plenty of toilet paper I guess...

The Braves had hoped to play their settled possession game that has worked so effectively at various times, but due to a few shuffles in the Braves lineup, another crap pitch (we'll have to play on it again if we win next week) and some useful Bega play it never came about.

There was no lack of commitment from those on the pitch, just a lack of constructive passing and communication- it just wasn't a day for success for the Braves. More of the patience on the ball that we've shown we're capable of this year and some sensible build up play will put our season back on track. With a solid session on Thursday, a night off the piss on Saturday and plenty of water come next Sunday, the Braves will bounce back against a team that has not beaten them this season.

On a spearate note- before our game on Sunday, there is an under 7's/8's gala day down at Braves Park. We really need some helpers for a few hours Sunday morning before it's time to start the trek down to last years fairly happy hunting ground of Eden.

No dramas today- bad days happen to every great sporting team-just ask the All Blacks at every world cup...

Go hard in the Minor Semi you Braves!

Braves get 2 on the bounce!

(above)Miko accidently using his left foot to kick with- the ball even stayed in!..

(above)Barney dared McLoskey to boot the ball as hard as he could into his ass...

It was a game that started in a flurry for the Braves- no sooner had they kicked off, won a throw in, had a long Miko throw (at least 3 metres from the sideline), an attempted flick on by Lenno, a bad bounce, ball struck a Wolumla arm, Dunko appealed sharply ( most useful thing he did all day) and a direct free kick in the area was awarded. When it was finally decided that it meant a penalty kick, el Capitane Maz stepped forward to convert. And convert he did. J Mac wouldn't have believed it had we texted him! He certainly wouldn't have beleived it when no more that 5 minutes later, the Braves were awarded another dotty from another handball. The luck that had deserted the Braves in their previous 2 encounters with the Bushrangers had come back. With a rush! Self proclaimed Association player of the year Crouch was tossed the ball by Maz (a foolish gesture seeing as though they are vying for top goalscorer honours), he duly converted a dodgy kick. Is there nothing this man cannot do?

The Braves then had a chance to play some football with it not being interrupted by pentalies, and by Jove, did Maz, Miko and Crouch put in. They were all carving it up! Our backs were keen and tight at the back, everyone was involved in the mids (except Dunko), Lenno racing up and down the pitch, Fox putting in more tough tackles than a a Beijing security guard at a Free Tibet protest. Stirred them up he did- you can't outfox the fox... The boys were keen up front too- Maz falling over by himself as much as ever and Simo and Al eager and striving for their first goals for the 08 season. They'll come lads...

It was the best period of the game for the Braves- although solid to half time, they were unable to turn some sensibly used possession into any more goals.

Although satisfied at half time, we knew 2 was going to be a slim lead if they snuck one back in the second half. After a spate of nasty tackles and a couple of cards, the one flash of football that was shown by them in the second half was rearded by a puzzling penalty. Buzz was keenly contesting a ball, but it was adjudjed to be a foul. McLoskey went close to keeping it out, but promises to have better hands when he signs up for the Braves offseason cricket team.

After a panicked check with the ref, last 6 minutes zoomed by pretty quick to seal a well deserved 3 points for the Braves. It puts us one more win (and a shock loss by Wolumla), away from a surge into second place in the last game of the year!

Injured Irish international Paddy Mick Sean Brian Dermot Fergus Liam Nial Rory O'Farrell took up bench management duties, despite the fact that he'd have iven his lovely sister away to be fit and play. He agreed that it was always nice to beat the auld enemy, even if there was a healthy slice of luck involved. Get well soon Paddy!

With the possiblility of a game from Naro, J Mac's return and Donnie filling in the hole left by McLoskey in goals next week, the Braves are the team that everyone fears right now...

Go you ever improving Braves!

Braves Dominate Grasshoppers!

Miko urged the Braves to get more excited after scoring....

It was a game that the Braves Brain Trust had approached with some degree of trepidation-there were rumours that Merimbula could possibly use first graders with the weekend off, so the Braves would be up against it for sure. It turned out that they had their normal Ressies lineup, and the Braves will be washing the shirts for at least one week postseason after winning today.

Speaking of style, the Braves were blessed to have the Bevitt-heavy Braves Orchestra trot down the hill with various weapons of music to inspire the Braves. Inspire they did- some amazingly witty chants, prasie for Rocket Wilton, Miko and the rest of the Braves when they did something clever. If only they were there every week!

After much pre game chat about throwing themselves into it from the first whistle, Maz did well with a 15 metre shot from the kickoff. And the Braves thought Dunko was a dickhead with his kickoff move last game.. At least we kept possession then.

The Braves started pretty well, probably getting the better of the opening exchanges, with the first choice defensive lie of Barney (goals), J Mac, Buzz and Ad keeping things tight as fox's wallet in a shout.

The midfield with Miko on the left, Rocket Wilton on the right( who received chants from the orchestra all game), and the regular central 3 looked pretty good- passing was settled and accurate from word go. Maz (making up for another lost toss and his kickoff disaster) and Mcloskey up front appreciated the balls to feet and were busy and threatening early.

The Braves were doing well playing down the flanks- Fox at his blistering bustling, and ever improving best was a real threat again- until he tried to give the final ball, but they're getting closerto the target each week:)

Miko was his streaking (pace wise) self down the left and was linking up really well with Maz who was hot stepping about the Grasshoppers defense all game. With Rugby done for the year, El Capitane could be a key figure come semi time.

It was (self proclaimed player of the season)Crouch who found himself johnny on the spot yet again to open the scoring for the Braves, a neat tuck in from closish range from some handy passing and buildup play from the braves on the left. After 19 duffed shots from the edge of the area, he was glad to have a short range finish. Can't remember who got the ball over, but it was a goodie.. Dunko started the goalscoring excitement buildup by taking the big man down in a front on hit on his way back to halfway.

Another Braves attack soon after saw McLoskey streak down the right and angled in towards the keeper after beating a defender with Braves lined up in the middle ready for the cross. It turned out to be a pretty shit cross (even Fox agreed), which beat the keeper at the near post. A bit sheepish on the way back on his goal celebration, but taken down in a heap again nonetheless, in order to build the excitement.

Halftime saw lots of positive words bandied about by the Braves, with more of the same for the second half the order of the day. It was not Braves' goalsneaking midfielders, but a weary Dunko who had pushed Maz momentarily back into the mids after a surge forward in the previous attack. Barney got the ball in his hands and Dunko took off on the left on halfway hoping like hell that Barney hit one clean (and not clean over the fence). He did and Dunko ran onto a glanced header from a Grasshopper defender, saw the goalie out and volleyed from at least 60 yards into the net. Had to score one for the year I guess!

Dunko trotted off to the bench(celebrating like a madman), which saw a quick reshuffle in the mids- the amazingly versatile McLoskey slotting into the centre. It wasn't long before a bit of a mess up at the back led to a looping ball sailing towards an empty net, and Barney and McLoskey decided to argue over it. No clear winner in the end- Barney missed the ball and poor old Dan ended up in the net, with a nasty graze making Lenno's one and only slide tackle for the year mark look like a mozzie bite. The big man came off for a little while, but was courageous enough to come back, even though Miko had called the helicopter ambulance for him after looking at his graze. J Mac heard McLoskey squeal when he hopped in the shower at home in Grasshoppertown later that evening.

His Bravery was to spur the Braves on, with Paddy slipping in possibly the most deserved goal of the year soon after, Dunko putting the old man up on his shoulder in his joy. Paddy's passing , patient play has been a boon for the Braves durig the season. At this stage, Goal celebrations had reached fever pitch- the Braves worrying that if Miko knocked one in, he might strip naked, so passing to him was kept to a minimum.

The game came to an end in a hurry as per every week- the Braves were really happy with themselves, the constant beat of drums making the unassailable cauldron of Brave Park that much more intimidating this week. A big Bevo thankyou to our esteemed enthusiastic misicians, backing up weary eyed from Jeff Bevo's 75th the night before!

As ever, A big thanks to Muss Hill who waved the flag on the far side (safer over there he says) and Drake, who came out of the refereeing retirement home, much to the annoyance of Lenno who thought for sure he was off towards goal:)

Wolumla next week (with coach J Mac on a weekend jolly, we'll be looking for a new centre back), then Bega in the last round in a relaxing run in for the semis on August 31.

Go you Braves and the Mighty Braves Orchestra!

Young Braves loose their ass!

Crouch said his goal was to have an ass like this bird one day...

There was dismay this week when it was revealed that the 3 youngest Braves had no bum to speak of. It was said that Crouch had an ass flatter than a plasma screen tv, Big Al had an ass smaller than a fish and Adam had an ass smaller than one of the nits that used to live in his dreadlocks!

Last year it was Pez who spent all season looking for his ass, with his multiple yellow cards for being such a no bum leading to a suspension. Eventually his lack of ass became such a problem that the association said to go away for 12 weeks and come back when he found his ass. No news on the search at this stage.

The young braves have spent all year pulling up their shorts on the field (with no ass to hold them up), but crouch has found time to be the best player in the competition despite his disabliity. Al has found it really difficult to stay on his bike (you try sitting down with no bum) and adam has had the car seat removed from his new rig as he's got nothing to sit down with either.

Miko was overheard talking to Team No Bum at training on Thursday evening....' Boys, I was the first winner of the Braves Missing Ass Award. It came as no shock, but when you realise why people keep mistaking your ass for an ironing board, it makes living with NBD(No Bum Disorder) a lot easier. Keep your heads up and remember, you can still be a dad with no bum'.

J Mac was later heard to say while looking at Dunko 'Anyone who doesn't work an 85 hour (like him)week is a bum'.

The Braves are considering starting a fundraiser for ass implants for the boys. An ass bra for the boys has been discussed as an option. J Mac has also offered one of his Ass Cheeks for the boys to share ( that would be more than enough). Donnie and Lucy have also made similar offers, so could be ok, if the money is raised for transplant surgery.

In the meantime, it is hoped that the boys can tighten their drawstrings sufficently to keep their shorts up on Sunday.

Watch this space(it's quite a bit bigger than the boy's asses put together...)..

Go you braves!